Nicholas

My life for almost the past two weeks has been nothing short of amazing. For that I have to credit my boyfriend.

I've never been treated so amazingly. He'll run and get me things so I don't have to get up. He offers to clean. He looks at me like I'm simply amazing. He always wants to just be near me. He pays attention to what I say. But the best part is, I function with him. I can do dishes and work and take care of what I need to do. My life doesn't stop around him. I don't worry that when I do dishes or clean he's judging me. He makes me feel safe, secure and loved, and I don't feel like I can't exist without him. Oh I want him, I want him for a long time, but I'm not so unhealthily attached that I will not be able to function without him.

If it's not obvious, I love him. I really do. He's fantastic. He's hardcore into comic books. Have you ever seen a nerd talk about their passion? Even if it's something that bores you, the way their eyes light up and they speak with such passion and conviction. Well when he looks at me it's just like when he's talking about comics.

As for the more intimate parts, I don't worry. I've never been more comfortable with my body with someone else. I have no fear whatsoever that he thinks I'm disgusting or secretly wishes I weighed less. He makes me feel beautiful, as I am.

Apparently I still suffer a bit from things that have happened to me in the past. It's not all been cuddles and love over here. Well it has but I mean things have gotten deeper. I've cried at least three times while he's been around. And we talked about it every time. He held me every time. I didn't know that I was afraid that once someone slept with me they'd have what they want and just leave. I do now. One night the fear just consumed me and I couldn't help but cry. He asked me what was wrong, held me and told me he wanted to be here with me.

I know our relationship is fast but everything with him just feels kind of...normal. For a while I kept expecting to wake up and have it all be some sort of dream. But he's real. I keep waking up with a super awesome sexy guy in my bed. I don't know what I did to deserve to have such an amazing person in my life.

So that's what I've been up to. I'm going back to bed to cuddle my awesome boyfriend now. It's weird that this is real.